I am
Hannah Nicole
poet/teacher/life enthusiast
4/26/2017 0 Comments now that you're gone“if only you were still in his arms, he'd never let you go again. I doubt he’d ever go to sleep without hearing your voice telling him that it’s okay for him to close his eyes and that you’ll still be there when he wakes up. Now that you’re gone, I wonder if he still cries when he thinks of you. I wonder if he hums your songs when he’s alone. I wonder if he reads through your old text messages and laughs at your stupid jokes. Now that you’re gone, I wonder if he’s ever written songs for you. I wonder if he still talks about you to his friends. I wonder if he sees your face in his daughter’s. Now that you’re gone, I wonder if he still cries when he’s alone. I wonder if he imagines he’s holding you when he holds his little girl. I wonder if you’re still on his mind. I wonder if he’s the one to bring you up in a conversation, or if he’s the one to change the subject. I wonder how hard it is to talk about you. Sometimes I wonder If he lashes out because of anger, If he cowers in guilt, Or if he smiles at your memory. I wonder what he did when he heard the news. Did he sit alone, shaking, unable to say a word? Did he run to his wife and cry on her shoulder? Did he call his friends and beg them to tell him that it wasn’t true? Now that you’re gone, I know that he misses you. I know that he fights back tears when he hears your name. I know that he has tried to move on, but part of you will always be with him. I know that you took a piece of him when you left. I wonder how hard it was for him to say goodbye, to pretend he was okay. I wonder the same about you. I wonder if his voice still cracks when he sees pictures of you. I wonder if his eyes burn when he hears your voice. I know mine do. “
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